It’s been a few days, actually, I think a little over a week! That’s alright though! I’ve been doing some amazing things for that time, and serving God, learning about my life in Christ, temptations still hitting me hard, but God is providing ways for me to be able to give them to Him! Been working a lot! One thing to note about me, is that I LOVE physical labor! I enjoy working my body hard, and then still going past that, because I’m serving as best as I can! Whether that be digging a hole into the ground for some posts for lights, or I’m driving a truck with a trailer in the back, and I have to reverse maneuver it, helping a group find their way around camp, chilling with the homies here at camp, or just trying to find time to relax and listen to God!
Being able to fly through our lists here together as Ministry Staff is absolutely fantastic! Before, we were getting used to each other, learning about how we operate, the jokes we say to each other! All together, we’ve been smashing our lists of projects, and it’s been a blast! I love being able to be here, serving with other amazing brothers and sisters in Christ! Living for the same purpose, wanting to love people, serve people to the best of our ability, no matter how body aching any work is, is absolutely fantastic!
Recently, I’m certain I have found my twin guys! It’s been an even more amazing two weeks with them around, and it’s been a grand time of late nights, deep talks, understanding, laughing, wrestling, crying, ab workouts, and serving God! It’s funny, I remember I used to say to my Mom often that I wish I had someone like me to talk with. Well, BOOM!!! *insert explosion sounds* They’re here, and it’s been a real blessing!
Recently, Satan’s been playing with my emotions. It’s hard with this aspect of loneliness, but our community have been helpful, insightful, beautifully loving to me and my struggles, understanding! It’s odd, really. For the simple fact that I am so unused to this “reciprocation” of emotional value. You know what I mean? My twin for instance, is almost similar to me! (Duh, the whole twin thing!) But on the aspect of emotionally, they understand! I swear, I must be dreaming guys!
Also, I had made a twenty-three hour drive to home to get my Mom, then we embarked on a journey to Joplin, MO, then drove back to Mom’s home, and then I drove back here to Dickson! On some level, I am upset that it wasn’t a normal stop home, to which I would have been able to see more people! But this wasn’t that instance! I needed to be back here for work at 07:30, so it was a quick trip! Absolutely though, it was such a blessing to have spent so much quality time with my Mom! She is absolutely, without a doubt, the most important person in my life, and at times, I forget just how easy and simple it is for me to make time to call her, or anyone really!
I’ve been listening to this Christian artist known as NF, and one of his songs personally got to me, on a deep emotional level, and I just had to call my Mom! Talk with her, tell her I was a bit homesick, hear her beautiful comforting voice, see her beautiful face and smile! Oh our goodness guys, I have never once been able to say that I deserve my Mom! God gave me an angel on earth as my Mom, and if I can encourage anyone who has continued to read this, it would be to not take anything in vain! Yes, people say this all the time, but sincerely! Some don’t have the opportunity to just call their Mom or Dad, siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, significant others! It’s coming back to the aspect of enjoy today, because there may not be tomorrow. But we do have a tomorrow guys, after Christ comes back! But until then, let’s break our opinions of bad stigmas, and just learn to love again man! Stop thinking that we deserve this because we’ve done this, and just sacrifice our justification of ourselves!
Right now, I would also just love to praise God for all the multitude of things He’s blessed me with. I get to be here at Dickson Valley, I’m meeting new people, learning and growing with them, establishing a deeper connection with them, loving them as my brothers and sisters in Christ, serving together for His Kingdom! We all get to share in the opportunity to grow individually, learning about ourselves, discovering our own calls from God! It’s truly exciting! For me, I knew that staying and serving here was God’s will, it just took a bit to figure that out! Being here, has helped shaped me back into a part of me I thought was lost, but God was just protecting me until now! Praying constantly of what God desires me to do next! I feel torn between serving here again for another year, or to go back to school! Before that is! God revealed ever slowly to me, hinting at me going back to OCC! To be honest, I argued. Not that I don’t want to go back, but I would love to have the opportunity to go home and serve everywhere I can there, help reintroduce Christ into every connection I have back at home, plant seeds into someone’s life, and let God take care of the rest. Well, as we all know, making a deal with God isn’t how it normally is. He told me not now. He wants me to go back to OCC. I’m excited to head back! I’m wanting to establish better habits for myself here at DVC, which will then correlate to my life back in dorm life at OCC! Already, God has been changing me, guiding me, helping me discern. Which follows with Satan ever so cleverly trying to bring me back to an unrighteous me. Sincerely, it’s a hard battle sometimes! But my why is worth getting the hits over and over again! Changing is worth everything, there is no comparison to which I have been graced with by being apart of His Kingdom! I know that I need to change some habits that can’t answer the question, “How does this bring glory to God?” Honestly, there shouldn’t be any problem with that. Nor should any circumstance be in the way of me getting to where God wants me to be, because He’ll get me there however possible!
I believe it’s said “Let go and let God”. Along with leaning in on His understanding rather than my own. It’s hard, along with getting more intimate and intentional! I’m stoked for the next few years of my life, hoping to serve majorly, along with getting my education! I’ll need help, so please, pray, encourage, love, and ask. “You can’t accomplish anything if you don’t take the first step.”